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What is Beethoven doing in his coffin right now? Decomposing.

#457 (0) - Nov 17, 2009 10:00 AM by lienmif - Corny Jokes - OMG, For Real! (5) - Big F*cking Deal, Who Cares (3)

Life’s a bitch, ’cause if it was a slut, it’d be easy.

#157 (0) - Nov 5, 2009 11:27 AM by Anonymous - Funny One Liners - OMG, For Real! (5) - Big F*cking Deal, Who Cares (0)

Today, I learned there is a taste difference between grabbing a glass of milk that has been sitting on your night table for a week and the one you put on there 3 minutes before. FML

#17 (0) - Oct 29, 2009 03:44 PM by Anonymous - F My Life - OMG, For Real! (1) - Big F*cking Deal, Who Cares (0)

Today, I went on a first date with an employee from Sobey's who asked for my number while I was grocery shopping. We decided to each bring a friend. I brought my roommate. He brought his girlfriend. FML

#13 (0) - Oct 29, 2009 03:41 PM by Anonymous - F My Life - OMG, For Real! (2) - Big F*cking Deal, Who Cares (0)

I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

#137 (0) - Nov 4, 2009 07:50 PM by Anonymous - Funny One Liners - OMG, For Real! (4) - Big F*cking Deal, Who Cares (0)

Katt Williams was arrested early Monday morning in Georgia and is being held on charges of burglary and criminal trespassing. He's being held in Coweta County jail and is set to face a judge today. : http://www.tmz.com/2009/11/09/katt-williams-arrested-burglary-georgia/

#242 (0) - Nov 9, 2009 12:06 PM by mh0825 - Bizarre & Crazy News - OMG, For Real! (5) - Big F*cking Deal, Who Cares (0)

Just stick it in my box.

#27 (0) - Oct 29, 2009 05:27 PM by Anonymous - Out of Context - OMG, For Real! (3) - Big F*cking Deal, Who Cares (0)

Didn't know I had it in me

#30 (0) - Oct 29, 2009 06:15 PM by Anonymous - Out of Context - OMG, For Real! (3) - Big F*cking Deal, Who Cares (2)

So I was wearing my favorite pair of jeans today and my dad says "Your camel toe is showing". I hate my parents.

#11 (0) - Oct 29, 2009 02:39 PM by Anonymous - I Hate My Parents - OMG, For Real! (6) - Big F*cking Deal, Who Cares (1)

Today, I recieved a message on MySpace from a cute guy I've been talking to for a while. It read, "I saw a girl in Old Navy at the mall last night that looked a lot like you, but she was much fatter." I was in Old Navy at the mall last night. FML

#16 (0) - Oct 29, 2009 03:42 PM by Anonymous - F My Life - OMG, For Real! (2) - Big F*cking Deal, Who Cares (0)

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